第一篇：英語搞笑面試劇本

劇本

面試官：L

應(yīng)聘者一：Z

應(yīng)聘者二：T 出場 室內(nèi)

L:（上來擦桌子，擺放文件，然后回頭）Today is the first day of Foxconn Group′s job interview.I′m responsible for the recruitment。I′m Li.We recruit all kinds of elite from nationwide.Swift horse is very often but bole is hard to find。I′m just the bole.It is well known,Our company′s benefits occupy a certain height in the world, Foxconn second, who would dare to say the first? Welcome to the job fair today.Let's start the interview with some questions.Now please make a simple introduce about yourself.Z:Good morning.It is really my honor to have the opportunity for an interview.I hope I can make a good performance today and I am confident that I can succeed.My name is Wang Ye.My father is “Li Gang”.Li,we have known each other ,right? Last night you and I had our dinner together and I wonder if you have lost something.I believe that this book must belong to you.(Z拿出一本書，書中夾著幾張100元錢，施接過書，把錢收起來，咳嗽兩聲，假裝正經(jīng)繼續(xù)面試。)I have just graduated from XX University with good aility.And also, I have a powerful family background.I think it will be helpful to both of us if I can entre this company.That’s all, and I believe it is enough.Thank you.L: I am very optimistic about you.T:I am almost a saint, I have no shortcoming.It does not matter where I come from or where I will go.Never expcet me to question, I am not a good questioner.you do not need to keep my words in your mind, because what I say is trivial.If beauty is a sin, I have committed heinous crimes;if there is wrong with a type, I have made the same mistake again and again;if wise must be punished, I will be hacked in pieces;if modesty is subjected to be torture, how could I ever escaped in succeed?

L: I can felt your modesty.L: What is your ideal? Z Z: Don,t talk about ideal with me , I′m giving up.L: Do you have an ideal?T T: Never try to spy out my thought, it is an extremely dangerous thing.In such a reality world, I am not sure it is right or not to talk about the dreams.But anyway, everyone should have a dream, in case it comes true, right? I once had many dreams in my life, big or small, but now, I just want to get the offer of this joy.L: Ideal is very plentiful, reality is very skinny.4 years of age I dreams of being the kindergarten teacher, because the teacher unlimited to eat noodles, also can eat while chatting.I can only eat a bowl, can not eat too slow, can not speak, nor can spill soup on the table or someone else's pants.10 years old my ambition was to be the daughter of an English teacher, so she would not call me up and recite every day, nor will pulling my ears I have stuttered back.But then I saw her daughter who came back from the United States , Her ears is surprisingly large.14 years old my ideal is to have a high nose, I often do my homework near a lamp, then squinted to see my silhouette reflected on the wall , I′m very sad to find the silhouette of my face looks like a monkeys, no wonder no one from small to big said I look good.......Z and T: Stop！!L: OH.I,m sorry.It is too sad to recall the past.let's back to the topic.Z.Why shoud I choose you from so many candidates ? Z:Just as i said, I have a powerful family background.My entering your company will bring a lot of benefit to both the company and me.This is a Win-Win situation.L:Talk about your understanding of gender.Z: I understand your company’s plan, but sex is not the key to elect

personnel, it also based on the individual level.I have excellent performance in all aspects.Some boys do not better than me.I can play the advantages of girls.And I am so beautiful~~ L: You want to apply for what position.Z: Marketing.L:Why.Z:I have a huge drinking capacity.I will not drunk even after a thousand cups of wine.This is a greatest advantage in marketing.L: T.Tell me What are your greatest strengths? T: My biggest advantage is that I have no shortcoming, Everybody who knows me all suppose that.And I think I am quite modest, really.L:Why did you come to apply for our company T:Do not ask me so much why, it makes you look like very stupid.Nevertheless, everyone deserves a joy, me too, Since I do not have a joy yet.I have to earn my live, also, I have no a adopted father to depend on like others.L: What do you think of the decision still difficult to do? T: If your mother and your girlfriend are drowning at the same time, which one you will save first.I think this question is the difficult one to answer.You know there can be too much truth in any relationships.L: Can you give me an example of team activities to prove your leadership ? T: Of course.But I need a minute to think since that there is so much to say.And it is a little difficult to me to think of the old thing.But as an old saying, every mountain is unclimbable until someone climbs.I am a student cadres in my college, and I always organized my classmates to participate in the labor activities.So, they all hated me in bones.L: Now let me test your intelligence.The first question ,Cut a cake three times then give to five people, so

how to cut ? Z: How to cut? T: Just like this, cut, cut, cut, ok.L: You don't want to add? The second question.A total of 25 people in a class, the 15 is not female and the 16 is not male , so how many people in this class? Z: Has anyone is neither male nor female? T: Are you sure to question me this stupid question? It is a huge insult to me.Twenty-five, by the way, never ask me such question again, thank you.L: OK.About this interview, we decide to hire both of you.Z, you have the background and strength, you are very suitable for sale.T, You're unique, You can go to planning department exert your talent.About the distribution of the work, do you have any questions? If not , tomorrow can be reported to the company.這時(shí)L的手機(jī)響了起來

L:What? Fang Zou zi, Anti-Counterfeit? Now I,m going back to the company clean up the mess? Well, so be it.Z: What happend? L: The company is out of question, I Gotta GO.T and Z: What about us? L:You don't have to work in the company.T: Previously said that? L: All invalid.

第二篇：搞笑英語話劇劇本

搞笑英語話劇劇本《 荊珂刺秦王》 旁白(Aside)/介紹（Introduction）： Long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways.Mr Jingke was the most famous sword 搞笑英語話劇劇本《 荊珂刺秦王》

旁白(Aside)/介紹（Introduction）： Long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways.Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman劍客 and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng”.But finally he failed.Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth.Action I

太子丹（上，掏出鏡子梳頭，做自戀狀）：Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world?(畫外音：It’s you, Prince Dan!太子丹高興狀)Thank u mirror!（面對觀眾）I’m Prince Dan, the magic mirror said I am the most attractive man in the world.But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror told him the truth.I am so scared.So what can I do?(向幕里大叫)Where is my minister? 阿三(畢恭畢敬): Honey, I am coming.太子丹：I’ve told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful、graceful、handsome、charming、cute、smart and dearest Prince Dan”!

阿三：Sure, honey!I have a good idea.We can find a hero to kill YingZheng~~~（作殺狀）

太子：Oh yeah~~~.What is the most expensive commodity in this century? Talent!（二十一世紀(jì)最需要的是什么，人才！然后拍阿三肩膀，做贊許狀）Good idea!But who is the right candidate? 阿三：After screening I have two promising persons on hand.One is Miss LiMoChou, the other is Mr JinKe.Tomorrow they will PK for the NO1 killer of the world.太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK? 阿三：Yes.Action II（《十面埋伏》中劉德華&金成武決斗時(shí)的音樂）荊軻

Are you Li mochou? 李莫愁 Yes.荊軻

OK.I’m Jingke, you know, I will let you know I am the king of the killers’ world.李莫愁

Are you challenging me? 荊軻

Off course!聳聳肩表示同意 莫愁 Come on!音樂起 兩人沖上前來

“人在江湖漂啊，哪有不挨刀啊，一刀砍死你啊，兩刀砍死你啊。?！?李莫愁倒地 荊軻大笑

李莫愁痛苦狀：What happened? Why aren’t you hurt?

荊軻: We don't need any reason to win a person.Don't we? Do we?（贏一個(gè)人需要理由么，不需要么，需要么？）

李莫愁：Momma always said: “Life is like a box of chocolates, Mochou.You never know what you're gonna get.” I got it, Momma is right.軻再次大笑

太子丹上（抱拳）：How are you? 荊柯：Fine, thank you, and you? 太子丹：Oh my God!Could you give me an innovative answer to “How are you”? 荊柯：Sure!太子丹：How are you? 荊柯：Fine, thank you, and your wife? 太子丹暈倒

荊柯：Hey, man, I’m kidding!

太子丹：Oh, I’m kidding too!（畢恭畢敬）May I have your name card, please? 荊軻從兜里掏出一卷紙，上面寫著： To be or not to be, that's a question.阿三：Hero，we need your help.荊柯：I am busy now!太子丹：You can get a lot of money.荊柯：I am very busy now!阿三：IC, ID, IQ card? 荊柯：I am very very busy now!阿三(手指上場的美女，激動(dòng)狀): Look!She is the most beautiful girl in the world.If you say O.K., she is yours.荊柯（流口水）：I have to say she is a very sexy and beautiful girl, but TCM is my only love!阿三：What? What’s the TCM?

荊柯;Hey, guy!You look so smart but why you didn’t know TCM? Any of them can give you the answer.阿三：Excuse me? What’s the TCM? 觀眾甲：TCM-Traditional Chinese MM.太子丹：I must show you the trump card.Ladies and gentlemen, this is Lipton Slimming tea.It is a brand new product of Unilever China.荊柯（激動(dòng)）：Slimming減食療法 tea!I have dreamed of it for thousands of times.My wife always threatens to leave me if I couldn’t reduce my weight.阿三：You want? Speak up if you want!Why do you keep silent? Why are you looking at me? Although your eyes are full of sincerity, I’m very glad, you still have to speak up.Take it!Do you really like? Really?你不是真的想要吧？難道你真的想要嗎??

荊柯(誠懇狀)Just tell me what should I do? I will do anything for you.太子丹與阿三（撞胯，擊掌）Yeah!Action Ш（《大話西游》主題曲響起）荊珂挽著妻子，太子丹,阿三在后.阿三：Hero, we have already reached Yishui River.荊珂：Just stop here, please.Farewell, my friends 太子丹：I will miss you, baby.（太子丹，阿三下。停頓?！短┨鼓峥颂?hào)》主題曲起，荊軻與妻子做Jack和rose在船頭的經(jīng)典造型，忽然荊軻看到一個(gè)美女——此時(shí)一個(gè)中國古典美女經(jīng)過，向荊軻拋媚眼，并拋下定情手絹。荊軻高興的盯著美女看，妻子發(fā)覺不對，扭過頭來。）

荊珂（急忙收斂）：Darling, I love you.妻子：I love you!You mean more to me than anything in this whole world!（《肖申克的救贖》）

荊珂(流淚)：I love you more.In spite of you and me and the whole silly world going to pieces around us, I love you.(哪怕是世界末日我都會(huì)愛著你，選自《飄》)妻子：Well.Be a man, just do it!I will be right here waiting for you.荊珂（欲走還留，執(zhí)子之手又曰）：Sweetheart!You must do me this honor...promise me you will survive...that you will never give up...no matter what happens...no matter how hopeless...promise me now, and never let go of that promise（泰坦尼克號(hào)沉船時(shí)，Jack對Rose的傾訴）.妻子:“I promise.” 荊軻:“Never let go.“妻子:”I promise.I will never let go, Jack.I'll never let go."（荊軻的發(fā)音和jack很像，所以加了一些《泰坦尼克號(hào)》的臺(tái)詞。）妻子努力擠出幾滴眼淚，荊珂上船，漸漸遠(yuǎn)去

妻子：It’s a good day to die.Never come back.Never?? Never?? 妻子(掏出手機(jī)撥號(hào)，阿三接手機(jī))： Thank you very much.As soon as I get the life assurance $1000, 000, I will transfer half of it, $500,000 to your account.阿三：Okay okay!旁白：Then Jingke was sent to Qin and finally killed by Yingzheng.

第三篇：搞笑英語話劇劇本

搞笑英語話劇劇本《西門吹雪與葉孤城》

搞笑7人劇本《西門吹雪與葉孤城》

演員表：西門吹雪、葉孤城、花滿樓、king、路人、上官雪兒

旁白

道具：牛奶兩袋，匕首一把，戒子一枚，紙屑若干。第一幕：決戰(zhàn)紫荊城之顛

旁白：A quiet village is covered with white snow.Birds are dancing in the cold.A man is walking along the street ,step by step.Wind is coming in silence.Another mysterious man approaches.Y與X相遇．

X：oH ,I am sorry to knock you!Y:, Never mind baby.X:Excuse me，who are you on earth? Could you tell me your name? Y:,I won’t change my name!no matter what happens.I’m the most famous——-YeGucheng.Who are you? X:Iamximenchuixue.Y驚訝:Ar, ximenchui xue?the best MartialArts? X:Great, you know me!Today is your dead date!Y抱腿：Please, please…… Don’t kill me!Let me go!X:No, I must kill you!Y:I don’t want to be killed.There are a eighty-year-old mother and a three-year old son to be looked after by me!X:No way!Because we are fighting now!you know ? Y突然站起冷冷的說：Don’t force me!X:Pardon!(Y拿出一袋牛奶)X搶過牛奶:milk, very good!I like drinking it.How do you know that? Y:please drink it!X喝完牛奶:Thanks, Y:Do you still want to kill me ? X:Sure, must!Milk is milk.Y(惱怒+冷酷):Very good!very good!I hope you will not forget what you said!? X:I’m sure I won’t!

Y:I must give you a lesson!If I don’t beat you this time, you’ll never behave properly!3-2-1!X捂著肚子，蹲下（做痛苦狀）：Oach,Oach!Y大笑：HaHa……the milk is exceed the time limit（一人路過，x起身跑過去）

X可憐狀: excuse me!Help , help , Where is the washroom?please ,tell me.Y:Oh,I see ,go along this street and turn right when you see a corssing road!

X:Thanks,byebye.Y:byebye(以勝利者的語氣，轉(zhuǎn)頭,看見 花滿樓)

Y:Who are you? H:Hua—man—-lou!Have you seen ximenchuixue? Y:Yes, he was beaten by me and is in “WC”.H驚訝:Now you are the best in the world!

Y:You are right!H:Teriffic!you are the one my king looking for!do you want join in us? If you follow my

king,he will give what you want.Y:Yes,It’s very good.H:Ok, follow me, Let’s go to see my king!

第二幕：無間道

H:My dearest!let me introduce yegucheng to you!（指Y）this is yegucheng.K:sit down plese, yegucheng.Y:excuse me,I have a question.will you give me what I want just if I follow you?

King:yes,I will.Y:That’s good.Can you give me a MM ? K:of couse.You are the one who has the similar taste with me!Hahaha……

Y:of course.美女出場 M:hello，帥鍋..K: this is shangguanxueer.ok,now let’s have a ritual.H走到Y(jié)前，《婚禮進(jìn)行曲》起，H神甫狀:Yegucheng!Do you want to follow my king no matter what happens such as cold headache , poor ,rich?

Y: Yes,I do.K: Huamanlou, come.put the ring on his finger!（音樂停）

X唱著上:(看到戒指)this ring should be mine!K:But who are you ? why should it belong to you? Y急切: king!Dear king!I must go now , my brother is looking for me.X冷酷:yegucheng!Come here!I want to tell you something!

Y抱X的腿:old brother!Forgive me!

X:Forgive you? Why ? Y: Once there was a chance before me , I lost it.If the god give me another chance, I’ll tell you “ I love you ” , If the remustbea limited period,I hope it is thousand year!X:You shall cheat me!all you did are wrong!how can you tell me the lady’s “WC”!Y:I like going lady’s WC.I……I……I think that you like what I like.(Ｙ又拿出一袋牛奶)

X:milk?I love you.K:Don’t say that “you love me”.I’ll kill you for you saying dirty word to me!X:What?(側(cè)耳裝著聽不到)You—kill—-me?come, come…(Ｘ上去抓住K)

K:Fuck you.I must kill you!X:How can you kill me? haha…… Y:Let me have a try!3-2-1(X捂著肚子，蹲下)

M: oh,what happened?（看著X，做驚嚇狀）are you ok?（跑到西門吹雪身邊）

Y :do you want to go to wc? X:Yes,I……I…… do.Y:haha, the milk was added 三聚氰胺 beyond standards.M: you , stupid , bad behavior!go away!

K;why ? why do you help him!who actually are you ? M: actually,I’m a spy sended by LuXiaofeng,and I fell in love with ximenchuixue.K驚訝:!you—you—You are X’lover? Y: do you know, you are the first person who cheated me!I hate you.(輕聲說)let me tell you,Ｘwill die.M撲倒在Ｘ的身邊：Ｘ,do’t die ,you should be alive ,there are much hope in the future and tomorrow is a good beginning!K:what a moving story!I was impressed!Y:life is a progress ,but it is depressed that it can not resume!M: life is a progress ,and it is delight that it needn’t resume!(M忽然將一把匕首插進(jìn)Y的心臟，Ｋ嚇跑.音樂《再見，警察》起)Y痛苦狀:I never anticipate you treat me by this ,why?tell me why?(Y死，音樂停)（X咳，H撲到身邊，電影《我的父親母親》原聲音樂起）M: X , oh , no ,you can’t die ,we will go home together.X:go home!? M:Tomorrow is another day!even you have the last second to live ,you should be alive ,not only for me , but for our love.X: promise me,you’ll get on well,and you’ll never let go.M I promise.I will never let go（X死）, M: be alive!yeah , be alive!be alive without ahendance!

第四篇：英語搞笑劇本改編

A：導(dǎo)演 B：編劇 C：黃花菜 D：柔柔 E：才女

旁白：最近一首《時(shí)間都去哪了》可謂是紅遍中國的大江南北啊，其主要原因呢，肯定與其歌詞所包含的重大教育意義有關(guān)，所以因曾經(jīng)拍攝電影而名噪一時(shí)的國際著名導(dǎo)演張某某正在策劃將歌曲改編成同名電影。

A：大家好，想必你們一定看過吧，不錯(cuò)，我就是這部戲的導(dǎo)演張某某，（鼓掌）可以了可以了。。

B：吃了嗎，我尊敬的導(dǎo)演！大家上午好！感謝大家來參與我們的選拔，我們這次將會(huì)選出一些優(yōu)秀的富有幽默感的演員來參與我們最新電影的拍攝，誰將會(huì)成為今天的幸運(yùn)兒呢，是你，是你，還是你？呵呵，讓我們拭目以待！

A：（害羞狀）親，過來坐吧~ A：（尷尬地笑了笑）哼哼，有請第一位面試者。

C：（風(fēng)情萬種，妖嬈嫵媚地走進(jìn)來，給觀眾一個(gè)飛吻）哦，我親愛的最愛的可愛的編劇，最帥氣的王子殿下，我這個(gè)“性感女神”粉墨登場了！每個(gè)人一定都認(rèn)識(shí)我，我姓黃名花菜，家住合肥市，二十歲還沒定過親。

B：黃花菜？的確很符合你無與倫比的氣質(zhì)，你父母真是足夠了解你啊。

C：哦，真的嗎，我也這么覺得呢！我知道我很美，你又那么帥，我們兩真的是郎才女貌啊，如果我們在一起。。

B：（嘔吐狀后正色道）我謝謝你全家，我不是同性戀！親愛的，展示一下你的才藝吧。

C：我需要你的幫助。二人開始跳舞。

B：（終于忍不?。┠阌型隂]完！（隨即被C強(qiáng)吻后暈過去。）A：（氣憤狀）我去你大爺!(將C踢下場，看著B開始犯花癡）哦，怎么會(huì)有這么帥的人，看得我的心小鹿亂撞，我應(yīng)該給他一個(gè)人工呼吸嗎？

B：（突然驚醒）你，你做什么！

A：沒什么沒什么，你看今天的天空多藍(lán)啊。B：額。。那就有請下一位！

D：大家好，人家天下無敵霹靂美少女是柔柔啦~（轉(zhuǎn)個(gè)圈，作公主半蹲裝，并開始跳舞。）

A：（不耐煩)行了行了。。（見沒有反應(yīng)）夠了！

B：哇哦，好可愛的一個(gè)萌妹子，你給我們帶來什么樣的才藝展示呢？

D：嗯，今天呢，我為大家?guī)硪皇赘?，叫《好一朵美麗的茉莉花》這是我唱給你聽的，親愛的王子。

A：這位小姐，時(shí)間有限，不要做跟表演無關(guān)的事。

A：（忍無可忍）夠了！你唱的跟貓叫一樣，聽了晚上都要做噩夢，誰給你勇氣站在這的！簡直就在浪費(fèi)我們的時(shí)間。

D：不，親愛的編劇，不是這樣的!B：哦，親愛的，你的表現(xiàn)的確是很特別啊，不過很可惜，是特別的糟糕，你實(shí)在是浪費(fèi)了你美麗的外表，我們要的是實(shí)力派的演員，而不是你這種花瓶。

D：實(shí)話告訴你，其實(shí)人家不在乎能不能成一名演員，人家在乎的是你啊，我最最親愛的，能和你在一起才是最重要的，我敢打賭，只要我們在一起了，我們的寶寶一定會(huì)是全天下最美麗聰明的。。

A：我了個(gè)去！這位小姐，我們今天是場演員海選，不是你的相親派對，我想你可能來錯(cuò)地方了！給我滾出去，別在這丟人現(xiàn)眼了！

B：你知道她是我的女人！

A：去你大爺?shù)呐?，你趕緊給我滾！D:(恨恨地走出去)A：看樣子你很吃香啊，誰都為你而來，不論是女人，還是男人。B：呵呵，我從來沒想過會(huì)是這樣。

A：下一位，可不可以來個(gè)正常人，我快hold不住了。E：東風(fēng)不來，三月的柳絮不飛，你的心如小小的寂寞的城，跫音不響，三月的春帷不揭，你的心如小小的窗扉緊閉。

A：請自我介紹一下。E：關(guān)于我的名字嘛。。等等，你知道《忐忑》嗎？（A搖頭，B點(diǎn)頭）額。。沒關(guān)系，那《The fox》呢？（A還是搖頭，B點(diǎn)頭）或者《萬萬沒想到》？（A還是搖頭，B還是點(diǎn)頭，E走上前牽起B(yǎng)的手想要親吻）知音啊知音，我真是太榮幸認(rèn)識(shí)你了！我就知道你懂我！

A：（拍開E的手）你放開他!E：你居然連這些當(dāng)代流行藝術(shù)都不知道，憑什么坐在這！A：你、、、你、、、你、、、E：好吧好吧，這些都不重要，你可以不知道它們，但你一定得知道我啊，將會(huì)趕上楊冪劉詩詩成為中國影壇最紅的女星——趙彤！

A：我不在乎你以后會(huì)怎么樣，我只想知道，你現(xiàn)在能帶給我們什么。

E：這個(gè)好辦！（轉(zhuǎn)向B）帥哥，我需要你的幫助。BE開始跳舞。

A：你在干什么，我受不了了，你可以走了?。ㄍ屏薊一把，拉回B）

E：你這么粗魯，你爸媽知道嘛？

A：我的天吶，我真的受不了了，怎么找一個(gè)優(yōu)秀的演員那么難，這是天要亡我??！你們?nèi)齻€(gè)，進(jìn)來！

C：編劇，你喜歡我的舞蹈對不對？ D：編劇，你喜歡我的歌聲對嗎？ E：編劇，你喜歡我的表演是不是?。?CDE：我們通過選拔了對不對？

A：額、、、非常感謝你們來到我們的海選現(xiàn)場，也給我們帶來了很多另類的表演，但是，很不幸地告訴你們、、、（電話響，接電話）你好，什么？！今天的面試現(xiàn)場只來了他們?nèi)齻€(gè)人，你們是怎么做宣傳的！我的天?。∧銈?nèi)齻€(gè)，通過面試了、、、CDE：我們終于成功了，我們可以成超級(jí)巨星了！

A：等等，可是我們需要四個(gè)演員啊，如今只有三個(gè)，怎么辦？ CDE：他可以加入我們！B：我？我不行不行。

A：他們說的對，你看看你，長得玉樹臨風(fēng)，風(fēng)流倜儻，人見人愛，花見花開，車見車爆胎！帥過劉德華，氣死金城武，完勝謝霆鋒，秒殺鐘漢良，完全是男主角的最佳人選！

CDE：說的太對了，我們支持你！B：不行不行，我真的不行！

A：你確定？（抽出B的工資卡）還想不想要這個(gè)月的工資啦！B：導(dǎo)演導(dǎo)演，放輕松啦~這些都是毛毛雨啦~都聽你的，都聽你的，嘿嘿。。（一臉諂媚的笑）

A：溫情電影《時(shí)間都去哪了》即將開機(jī)，請大家多多支持！面試結(jié)束了，三個(gè)奇葩演員，帥氣的編劇和霸氣的導(dǎo)演將會(huì)給我們帶來什么樣的精彩呢？

那一刻，他與她相遇，時(shí)光的筆尖流轉(zhuǎn)，寫下了世間最美的情詩。當(dāng)愛情悄悄來臨，能擁著你，成了我最大的幸福。我愿用一枚戒指，許下關(guān)于你未來永恒的承諾，親愛的，嫁給我！（女兒出生，小時(shí)候）1+1=3，他們的愛情故事開始有了續(xù)集。（女兒青春期）當(dāng)她拖著時(shí)間的尾巴快快長大，當(dāng)沒有硝煙的戰(zhàn)爭悄然打響，時(shí)間啊時(shí)間，你在哪里？歲月改變了鬢角的顏色，他守一座城，她開一扇門，等迷路的孩子回家。（女兒成年）時(shí)間哪也沒去，它總是在哪里，陪她成長，伴他們變老，品那幸福釀的酒發(fā)出馥郁的香。父母不需要我們回報(bào)什么，只需要我們常回家看看就好，相守留住時(shí)間，可以留住幸福！

一起謝幕：愿我們都常回家看看可愛的爸媽，謝謝…………..

第五篇：英語搞笑話劇劇本

二人用版本

Scene1（At Salesman’s home）

N: In a dark dirty house, there lived a small, dirty salesman.He always makes unhealthy candies and sells them to the students.He has a lot of money now.But how does he make the candies? Oh, xu …… He is coming!S: Hello, do you know me? No? Oh, let me tell you.I’m the famous candy salesman at the school gate.My candies are very popular,(展示)，I don’t know why.The foolish students always come here.I’ll be a boss soon!Candy, money, candy, money……

Oops!It’s time to make candies now.(看表)First, put the flour on the table.Then, water, sugar, flour.(邊說邊做)Now press, press……

Oh, my dirty hands!Never mind!Just do it!(滿不在意的神情)Press, press……

Oh, my god!Never mind!Just do it!Press, press, the children will not know it , it’s OK,hehehe…… Now let me cut it into pieces

加旁白1人屬于4人用）

白雪公主與七個(gè)小矮人 Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs 英文短劇本 旁白：Once upon a time, there was a queen.She had a pretty daughter named Snow White.Soon after the child was born, the queen died.The queen married another queen.The stepmother was very jealous.She dressed Snow White in rags and forced her to do the housework all day and all night, such as sweep and mop the floor, do some cleaning, carry water and so on.白雪：(Sweep and mop the floor, do some cleaning, carry water and so on.)皇后：I’m the new queen.I’m very beautiful.you see.If anyone is more beautiful than me, I’ll kill her.I have a magic mirror.If I want to know something, It will tell me surely.Now, mirror, mirror, come here!魔鏡：Yes, I’m coming.Your Majesty!What do you want to know? 皇后：Mirror, mirror, on the wall.Who is the fairest of the all? 魔鏡：Yes.Your Majesty!You are the fairest of all, I think.But there is a young lady.She is as white as snow, as red as rose and as black as ebony.She is much more beautiful than you.皇后：She is much more beautiful than me?Who is she? Tell me quickly.四人用版本

Global warming

A． Class begins, good afternoon everyone.B． C.D ：Good afternoon, teacher.A.First, I will ask you a question: What is the serious problem nowadays ? B.I think it’s the problem of environment pollution.A.It’s related to our correct answer.But it isn’t correct one.B.Is it the problem of population increasing? A.No.C.Oh.I got it.It’s global warming.A.Right!Global warming is one of the serious problems nowadays.Because……

B.Teacher.I have a question.It was very cold indeed this winter.I think it’s global cooling!

A.You got the wrong concept.Global warming doesn’t only mean that the weather is getting hot, but also mean that the weather is out of control.So it will be sometimes very cold.B.Teacher.What causes “ global warming”?

C.I know.Now people drive too many cars and the exhaust gases discharged by the cars and lorries pollute the air and also destroy the nature.It causes global warming.A.You are right.Do you know what will happen with the global warming?

B.Yes.The ices in South Pole are going to be melted and at the time, many islands will be gradually flooded with water.Human will have no places to live.C.Surely, we don’t want that will happen.A.What sould we do to stop “Global warming”?

B.I think we can protect the environment from ourselves.We can plant trees C.When we are protecting the environment, we are saving ourselves.A.Ok.Students, we can’t only speak but not do later.Let us go planting trees.D.Oh, teacher!Tomorrow is March the twelfth, it’s tree-planting day!

A.Yes!Now all of you know the importance of protecting the environment.B．C．D．Let us do our best to stop “Global warming” and make our earth a lovely homeland!

A.That is good.I hope you all will be succeeded in protecting the environment.Now the class is over bye-bye students!B.C.D.good bye.Teacher.（4人版本）

Narration: Carrie, Cici and Wing are co-worker of a company.This day they are talking in the office.Ca: Bingo!I finally finish this case.It is really tough!I have not slept well for almost a week.Wing: Me too.I always get so busy in this season.I have drunk three cups of coffee in order to keep awake.Ci: Our boss must be enjoying his holiday in Fiji very much.What do you think he will feel when he comes back to see our case? Ca:Of course he will feel surprised and give each of us a promotion.Wing: Come on, he is a devil, how could he do this to us? Anyway, we should award ourselves for these days hard work!Ca: You are right.Let’s pig out on junk food!

Wing: I have stayed in China for a whole year and I miss my hometown.I miss German food!Ca: so do I.how much I love French food!Ci: I have not eaten German or French food before.Do you have any recommendation? Ca: If you visit France or go to a French restaurant, snails, cheese, and goose liver and red wine are the best choices.Wing: You also can’t miss the famous German sausage, ham and blue checse Ci: They all sound yummy.But do you know what Chinese eat when they miss their families? Wing&Ca: No Ci: The answer is dumplings!Ca:Well ,I heard that before though I haven’t tasted.Wing: Can you make dumplings, CiCi? Would you make some for us? I have been longing for dumplings for a long time.Ci: Aha, it is as easy as a pie for me.what about coming to my house tonight? We can make dumplings together.I will teach you how to cook it.Ca: Great!That is fantastic.Then it will be the first time to make and eat dumplings Wing: Very good idea!We could busy some basic ingredient at the supper market after work.Ci: Sure.We need flour, yeast, pork, cabbages, vinegar, sauce and ginger.(The three colleagues had their shopping and now they are in CiCi’s house)CiCiours some pour on the table and said:”Carrie, can you fetch some water here?”

Ca: sure, here you are.what s next? Ci:Ci:we have to mix the flour yeast and water together.be careful ,don’t add too much water.Ca: Okay, I’m kneeing the dough repentedly.it is becoming and softer Wing: Yeah, I am cutting the pork into many small pieces, and then I will add several spoons of oil in it.shall I blend them? CiCi: Yes, make sure they blend well.A bit salt and a spoon of vinegar are needed, too.(an hour later)Ca: Yes, the dumplings are prepared.lets start!CiCi: Wait!I remember well that you all miss the food from your hometown.Look, what are these? Ca: Wow!Cheese!Where did you get it? And my favorite red wine.Wing: God.Those are sausage and ham, I can’t believe it!

CiCi: Haha, it is a big surprise, isn’t it? Now ,we are got all three countries’ food ready.Ca: So it is a complete big meal.Wing: An unforgettable banquet in my life.Let’s cheers!Ca, Ci, Wing: Cheers!