第一篇：《二十幾歲,沒(méi)有十年》讀后感

《二十幾歲，沒(méi)有十年》是一本關(guān)于青春，夢(mèng)想，愛(ài)情，人生的書(shū)籍。書(shū)中一篇篇文章，短小卻勵(lì)志，每每翻起來(lái)看，都如同一杯心靈雞湯，給我注入更多正能量。

二十幾歲，是人生中非常美好的一個(gè)階段。但這個(gè)階段，有的人把自己的十年活出了精彩，過(guò)得充實(shí)而清晰；有的人卻渾渾噩噩，過(guò)得迷茫而凌亂，恍恍惚惚間，十年過(guò)去了，似乎沒(méi)有留下什么。

該書(shū)的作者孫晴悅，與我年齡相仿，但她卻有及其豐富的人生閱歷。2010年，進(jìn)入中央電視臺(tái)工作。2012年赴巴西，擔(dān)任央視駐拉丁美洲中心站記者。專訪過(guò)拉美多國(guó)政要，從事時(shí)政，財(cái)經(jīng)，文化新聞報(bào)道。足跡遍布四分之三個(gè)地球，如今依舊在路上。從她細(xì)膩的文字，我感受到了她的生活過(guò)得是熱血的、勇敢的，充實(shí)而有價(jià)值的，同樣，在努力中，她也有孤單、無(wú)助和疲憊。但這樣的人生，敢于為自己的理想而奮斗，活出了這個(gè)階段最良好的狀態(tài)，是如此的真實(shí)而精彩?！?/p>

我對(duì)比了我自己，大學(xué)畢業(yè)，擇業(yè)，就業(yè)，前幾年里確實(shí)過(guò)得特別迷茫。

剛開(kāi)始工作時(shí)，一直覺(jué)得勤勤懇懇工作就好，每天埋頭苦干，甚至可以說(shuō)有點(diǎn)閉門(mén)造車。而我所處的環(huán)境下，其實(shí)有許許多多可以學(xué)習(xí)的資源，我都不能很好地去利用。年輕的我們，一直覺(jué)得以后的時(shí)間還很長(zhǎng)，日子一天天過(guò)去，當(dāng)我們恍然大悟，回首過(guò)往，發(fā)現(xiàn)錯(cuò)過(guò)太多的機(jī)會(huì)，錯(cuò)過(guò)了太多的人和事。而這本身就是對(duì)青春最大的不尊重。

我現(xiàn)在還一直很感謝引導(dǎo)我進(jìn)入名師工作室的同事鄧穎老師，是她告訴我需要更好地把握身邊的學(xué)習(xí)資源，來(lái)開(kāi)闊自己的視野，提升自己的能力；是她讓我有機(jī)會(huì)認(rèn)識(shí)到工作室里面來(lái)自各校的優(yōu)秀的老師們，與他們學(xué)習(xí)，并一起成長(zhǎng)。進(jìn)到工作室中，遇到了許許多多優(yōu)秀的老師。當(dāng)我羨慕他們豐富的學(xué)識(shí)、視野和閱歷的同時(shí)，業(yè)發(fā)現(xiàn)了他們光環(huán)的背后付出的努力。但我知道，與優(yōu)秀的人在一起，自己不夠努力的話，并沒(méi)有意義。所以，我只能更加積極努力，才能變得更強(qiáng)。

我們不得不承認(rèn)努力很累，但不努力更累。簡(jiǎn)單的說(shuō)，當(dāng)你想要評(píng)職時(shí)，發(fā)現(xiàn)沒(méi)有課題，沒(méi)有論文，沒(méi)有班主任經(jīng)驗(yàn)，看到別人擁有一堆的獎(jiǎng)勵(lì)和證書(shū)，后悔自己沒(méi)有好好去爭(zhēng)取。

所以，去變強(qiáng)，固然很累，但是不強(qiáng)會(huì)更累。只有變強(qiáng)了，才可以有更多的選擇余地，才能夠在某一個(gè)時(shí)刻華麗轉(zhuǎn)身，才能發(fā)現(xiàn)自己與原來(lái)的你有了不同。

分享里面的一段話與大家共勉：“我渴望的自由，不是要隨時(shí)隨地可以去旅游，不是要上班不受領(lǐng)導(dǎo)約束，而是在每一個(gè)我想要改變，想要嘗試一種不同的生活，想要再往前走一步的時(shí)候，永遠(yuǎn)都有選擇的權(quán)利和能力?！?/p>

第二篇：二十幾歲的女孩應(yīng)該有思想

龍?jiān)雌诳W(wǎng) http://.cn

二十幾歲的女孩應(yīng)該有思想

作者：楊 瀾

來(lái)源：《課外閱讀》2010年第05期

二十幾歲的女孩是片蔚藍(lán)色的天空，它可以是悲傷的，也可以是喜悅的，但，請(qǐng)記住，它一定是有追求的。

一、擁有品位

女孩到了二十幾歲后，就要開(kāi)始學(xué)著用心地經(jīng)營(yíng)自己了，它體現(xiàn)在自己的外表以及涵養(yǎng)上。每一個(gè)女孩都是特別的，都應(yīng)該有自己獨(dú)特的品位，可能很多女孩會(huì)覺(jué)得品位與時(shí)尚或奢侈品是掛鉤的，其實(shí)不是，品位是一個(gè)人去觀察事物時(shí)的態(tài)度。

在某種程度上，一個(gè)人的品位與她的氣質(zhì)是相輔相成的，品位的高低取決于一個(gè)女孩在日常生活里對(duì)新事物的發(fā)現(xiàn)。品位是自己獨(dú)特的味道，每個(gè)女孩都要有自己的品味。一個(gè)廉價(jià)的飾品只要戴出了屬于它的另類，也能夠表現(xiàn)出自己的品位。

二、養(yǎng)成看書(shū)的習(xí)慣

女孩到了二十幾歲后，就已經(jīng)開(kāi)始慢慢地接觸社會(huì)了，在與別人交往的過(guò)程中，談吐與修養(yǎng)是最能征服別人的。我不相信一個(gè)不喜歡看書(shū)的女孩，她會(huì)是充滿智慧的。沒(méi)事的時(shí)候，到書(shū)店逛逛，認(rèn)真地挑幾本可以提升自己的書(shū)籍買(mǎi)回家閱讀。書(shū)可以讓人們的生活豐富，也可以讓人們的思想改變，選擇閱讀一本好書(shū)，勝過(guò)一個(gè)優(yōu)秀的輔導(dǎo)師。

三、要試著發(fā)現(xiàn)生活里的美

女孩到了二十幾歲后，就要逃離那些灰暗的小說(shuō)，它只會(huì)讓大家與悲傷越貼越近，生活并不是小說(shuō)里情節(jié)的翻版。不要總提醒著自己遇到的不幸，要知道在這個(gè)世界上有很多人比你還不幸，只要能夠抬頭看到陽(yáng)光就是幸運(yùn)的，那些生活里的挫折比起一個(gè)人的人生只不過(guò)是再小不過(guò)的插曲。想在這個(gè)社會(huì)上立足，就要有平和的心態(tài)，在患得患失的人生里，我們時(shí)刻部在選擇著，也被別人選擇著，我們應(yīng)該有阿Q精神，痛苦與快樂(lè)的生活都是我們選擇的，為什么要讓自己沉溺在痛苦中呢?

想成功的人都是樂(lè)觀的人，悲觀永遠(yuǎn)都是成功的阻礙，只有積極向上的情操才會(huì)讓生活變得美好。相信明天一定會(huì)比今天好，只要你努力了，社會(huì)一定是公平的，不要抱怨生活，否則只能證明你自己沒(méi)有真正去努力。

四、跟有思想的優(yōu)秀人交朋友

女孩到了二十幾歲后，就要開(kāi)始有目的性地去選擇朋友，社會(huì)中的人脈非常重要，而你選擇加入的朋友圈也會(huì)對(duì)你的人生有著很大的影響。如果你的朋友都是一些積極、向上、樂(lè)觀的人，你也會(huì)被他們感染。

一個(gè)好的朋友可以讓你的人生有很大的改變，他會(huì)讓你變得樂(lè)觀。女孩到了二十幾歲后，要多一些朋友，自私一點(diǎn)也就是說(shuō)，多交一些對(duì)自己有幫助的朋友。你可以從他們的身上學(xué)到東西，但是想交朋友，你就要對(duì)他們付出真誠(chéng)，不要只是為了想利用他們才與他們交往，沒(méi)有人是傻子，你對(duì)別人好與不好，別人也都清楚地看得到。用自己的真誠(chéng)與那些有思想的優(yōu)秀人交朋友吧!

五、遠(yuǎn)離泡沫偶像劇

女孩到了二十幾歲后，就要開(kāi)始遠(yuǎn)離那些虛假的偶像劇了，它并不能與現(xiàn)實(shí)生括掛鉤，它是超越了生活的，女孩不應(yīng)該再沉溺于這種虛假的童話氛圍里了，有時(shí)間多看一些能夠幫助自己的節(jié)目。

偶像劇會(huì)影響人們對(duì)社會(huì)的判斷能力，所以，請(qǐng)遠(yuǎn)離泡沫偶像劇。相信一個(gè)優(yōu)秀的女孩，應(yīng)該不會(huì)花大把的時(shí)間沉溺在偶像劇里。

六、學(xué)會(huì)忍耐與寬容

女孩到了二十幾歲后，就要慢慢地學(xué)會(huì)忍耐與寬容了。社會(huì)并不是一個(gè)任性的地方。請(qǐng)放下理直氣壯的壞脾氣，在適當(dāng)?shù)臅r(shí)候讓一步，不僅可以體現(xiàn)出你的涵養(yǎng)，而且還會(huì)讓你成為受人歡迎的女孩。

生活里會(huì)遇到很多不公平的事情，也會(huì)遇到很多讓你無(wú)法接受的人，我們不能試著去改變別人，與其非常憤怒地大聲指責(zé)別人的行為，不如懷著理解的心態(tài)給對(duì)方一個(gè)微笑，任何一個(gè)人都不會(huì)去傷害一個(gè)善良的人。聲嘶力竭地與別人爭(zhēng)論并不能贏得所謂的自尊，反而會(huì)讓你丟掉自尊。

七、讓美貌成為你的資本

女孩到了二十幾歲后，就要開(kāi)始讓你的美貌發(fā)揮作用了，在適當(dāng)?shù)臅r(shí)候讓你的美貌掌握足夠的發(fā)言權(quán)。漂亮的外貌并不是每個(gè)女孩都擁有的，讓漂亮的外貌成為你的資本，在需要的時(shí)候使用一下，它可以開(kāi)啟你人生中的很多機(jī)遇。雖然有時(shí)候有人說(shuō)漂亮的女孩都是花瓶，但是花瓶如果擺在了合適的位置，它就是藝術(shù)品。女孩的青春美貌也只是短短的數(shù)年，所以要善于利用你的美貌。

但是女孩不能因?yàn)橛辛嗣烂簿拖萑胱詽M中，有著美麗的外表又有著智慧的內(nèi)在才是優(yōu)秀的女人，請(qǐng)女孩們合理地利用自己的美貌，千萬(wàn)不要因?yàn)樽约旱亩虝旱拿烂捕屪约撼翜S。

八、離開(kāi)任何一個(gè)男人，你都會(huì)活得很好

女孩到了二十幾歲，就要理智地對(duì)待自己的情感。為什么要為一個(gè)男人而讓自己陷入不愉快的心情中呢?一個(gè)不懂得欣賞你的男人，沒(méi)有資格讓你為他難過(guò)悲傷，每一個(gè)女孩都是美麗的，她在等待著一個(gè)懂她的男人出現(xiàn)。與其讓自己陷入到一個(gè)無(wú)望的愛(ài)情中，不如瀟灑地轉(zhuǎn)身，充實(shí)自己，讓自己投入到工作學(xué)習(xí)中。

曾經(jīng)我也以為離開(kāi)了他我不能活了，后來(lái)我問(wèn)了自己一百遍：離開(kāi)了他，我還能不能活?結(jié)果有一百二十遍回答是：我會(huì)活得很好。離開(kāi)那個(gè)不懂欣賞你的男人，這就是最華麗的轉(zhuǎn)身。

九、有看理財(cái)?shù)膭?dòng)機(jī)，學(xué)習(xí)投資經(jīng)營(yíng)

女孩到了二十幾歲，就要開(kāi)始學(xué)習(xí)理財(cái)了，不要以為自己無(wú)法成為富翁，就花錢(qián)大手大腳，也不要認(rèn)為明天有掙不完的’錢(qián)，而把今天的錢(qián)花在不應(yīng)該花的地方。

十、誰(shuí)說(shuō)女人不如男

女孩到了二十幾歲，就要堅(jiān)信不管是在生活中還是在職場(chǎng)中，并不只有男人才能有建樹(shù)，只要女人努力了，她同樣可以在男人的世界里穿梭。女人的資本有很多，在職場(chǎng)中女人略占優(yōu)勢(shì)，在有些行業(yè)里，女人會(huì)發(fā)揮著自己獨(dú)特的優(yōu)勢(shì)去拼博?，F(xiàn)在不流行家庭主婦的角色了，外面有著大把精彩的世界等待著女人去追求。

在這個(gè)社會(huì)里，沒(méi)有誰(shuí)一定要沒(méi)有理由地呵護(hù)誰(shuí)。男人也部喜歡有個(gè)性有能力的女人。努力吧，只要你擁有了屬于自己的一片天空，還害怕自己的這片天空下沒(méi)有白云嗎?只要你是一個(gè)才華出眾的女人，還害怕優(yōu)秀的男人不欣賞你嗎?

十一、拭一個(gè)能幫你實(shí)現(xiàn)夢(mèng)想的老公

女孩到了二十幾歲后，就要有明確的夢(mèng)想。然后再為這個(gè)夢(mèng)想去奮斗。女人完全可以讓自己的夢(mèng)想跟隨著自己一起嫁給一個(gè)男人，只要他愿意幫你實(shí)現(xiàn)夢(mèng)想，就說(shuō)明他是一個(gè)懂得欣賞你的男人。

十二、讓青春放肆一些，笑容燦爛一些

女孩到了二十幾歲后，正值青春年華，有著大把的青春可以放肆地綻放。女孩可以在適當(dāng)?shù)臅r(shí)候倔強(qiáng)一些，在適當(dāng)?shù)臅r(shí)候驕傲一些，可以讓那些美麗的嘴角微微地牽動(dòng)著。二十幾歲的女孩是最美的，可以肆意地笑，可以倔強(qiáng)地哭。二十幾歲的女孩不要怕輸，青春才剛剛開(kāi)始，我們有著輸?shù)馁Y本，我們可以重新開(kāi)始自己的追求。二十幾歲的女孩要做最真的自己，最美的年華留給燦爛的微笑，讓愛(ài)情鮮明地呈現(xiàn)，要敢愛(ài)敢恨，敢于追求。

第三篇：讀《二十幾歲的女人》有感

讀《女人二十幾歲》有感

作為一個(gè)二十幾歲的女人來(lái)說(shuō)，確實(shí)是正處在人生最燦爛的時(shí)期，這個(gè)時(shí)候正是美貌與智慧并舉的時(shí)候；正是意氣風(fēng)發(fā)，逢勃向上的時(shí)候；正是大施才華，大展身手的時(shí)候。同是也正是決定下半輩子過(guò)什么樣的生活的時(shí)候，也正是轉(zhuǎn)折時(shí)期，所以過(guò)好這幾年是至關(guān)重要的。

二十幾歲的女孩首先應(yīng)獲得經(jīng)濟(jì)上的獨(dú)立，不論你的家里是多么顯貴，不論你的男朋友是富二代還是官二代，你首先要學(xué)會(huì)的是靠自己的雙手養(yǎng)活自己，只有保持經(jīng)濟(jì)上的獨(dú)立，才不至于做別人經(jīng)濟(jì)的附庸品，才不至于將來(lái)向別人搖尾乞憐。正所謂經(jīng)濟(jì)基礎(chǔ)決定上層建筑，只有把基礎(chǔ)打牢固了才能在以后的生活中昂首挺胸抬頭做人，否則一輩子靠他人只會(huì)讓他人對(duì)你產(chǎn)生厭惡，畢竟總是企圖從別人荷包里拿錢(qián)不是一件容易的事，就算你將來(lái)的丈夫愿意養(yǎng)你一輩子，但是別人會(huì)怎么看你呢，你自己將來(lái)又將怎么樣看自己呢。

二十幾歲的女人，其次應(yīng)該懂得合理的安排自己的生活，讓自己活得更精彩，讓生活更加有意義。正處于風(fēng)華正茂的時(shí)候，正應(yīng)該把自己的生活安排好，做自己喜歡的事情，不給自己留遺憾，當(dāng)然有些人也不太明白自己喜歡什么,適合做什么工作，對(duì)于這樣的人來(lái)說(shuō)就更是需要更多的投入到實(shí)踐中去，多多嘗試，總有一件事在不影響道德倫理的前提下是你熱愛(ài)去做的，那么這就值得你為之奮斗一生。有個(gè)前進(jìn)的目標(biāo)并且一直向這個(gè)目標(biāo)看齊，這是多么值得慶幸的一件事情。

二十幾歲的女人，應(yīng)該有自己獨(dú)立的個(gè)性，不隨大流，不屈言附眾，特立獨(dú)行，不滿足現(xiàn)狀，能勇敢的跳出條打框框的束縛，敢想敢做，活出最真實(shí)的自我，不過(guò)分壓抑自己，不淺嘗輒止，不碌碌無(wú)為。

二十幾歲的女人，應(yīng)該心中充滿愛(ài)，不抱怨，不流淚，上天把最美好的時(shí)光給我們是為我讓我們來(lái)感受生活中的愛(ài)的，同時(shí)要學(xué)會(huì)愛(ài)與被愛(ài)，在愛(ài)與被愛(ài)之中完善我們的生活，充實(shí)我們的人生意義。

第四篇：二十幾歲是不可揮霍的光陰

二十幾歲是不可揮霍的光陰（中英字幕）

Meg Jay Ted英語(yǔ)演講：

kira86 于2013-06-09 20歲，不可揮霍的光陰。在這個(gè)點(diǎn)擊過(guò)百萬(wàn)的TED演講中，心理咨詢師Meg Jay說(shuō)不能因?yàn)榛橐觥⒐ぷ骱妥优且院蟮氖虑?，現(xiàn)在就可以無(wú)規(guī)劃的生活。她提供三條建議幫助20多歲的年輕人重新審視自己的生活，不要做后悔的決定。

為什么要聽(tīng)她演講

近期觀點(diǎn)認(rèn)為，25歲似乎太過(guò)年輕，無(wú)法做重大決定。臨床心理學(xué)家Meg Jay藉由心理學(xué)實(shí)務(wù)和著作《20世代，你的人生是不是卡住了》闡述，許多二十世代深陷《時(shí)代》雜志所謂「我我我世代」的迷思和誤導(dǎo)中。她認(rèn)為「三十世代是新二十世代」的說(shuō)法使人們輕忽成年階段最具可塑性的時(shí)光。

擷取十余年來(lái)與數(shù)百名二十世代個(gè)案及學(xué)生咨商的經(jīng)驗(yàn)，Jay將科學(xué)融入一段段引人入勝、不為人知的故事中。精彩、生動(dòng)的故事發(fā)展，顯示為何二十世代并非發(fā)展停滯期，而是僅此一次的發(fā)展高峰。二十世代是個(gè)關(guān)鍵期，我們所做之事－及未做之事－對(duì)未來(lái)人生、甚至后代都將產(chǎn)生巨大影響。

Meg Jay：二十幾歲，不可揮霍的光陰 英語(yǔ)演講稿：

When I was in my 20s, I saw my very first psychotherapy client.I was a Ph.D.student in clinical psychology at Berkeley.She was a 26-year-old woman named Alex.Now Alex walked into her first session wearing jeans and a big slouchy top, and she dropped onto the couch in my office and kicked off her flats and told me she was there to talk about guy problems.Now when I heard this, I was so relieved.My classmate got an arsonist for her first client.(Laughter)And I got a twentysomething who wanted to talk about boys.This I thought I could handle.But I didn't handle it.With the funny stories that Alex would bring to session, it was easy for me just to nod my head while we kicked the can down the road.“Thirty's the new 20,” Alex would say, and as far as I could tell, she was right.Work happened later, marriage happened later, kids happened later, even death happened later.Twentysomethings like Alex and I had nothing but time.But before long, my supervisor pushed me to push Alex about her love life.I pushed back.I said, “Sure, she's dating down, she's sleeping with a knucklehead, but it's not like she's going to marry the guy.”

And then my supervisor said, “Not yet, but she might marry the next one.Besides, the best time to work on Alex's marriage is before she has one.”

That's what psychologists call an “Aha!” moment.That was the moment I realized, 30 is not the new 20.Yes, people settle down later than they used to, but that didn't make Alex's 20s a developmental downtime.That made Alex's 20s a developmental sweet spot, and we were sitting there blowing it.That was when I realized that this sort of benign neglect was a real problem, and it had real consequences, not just for Alex and her love life but for the careers and the families and the futures of twentysomethings everywhere.There are 50 million twentysomethings in the United States right now.We're talking about 15 percent of the population, or 100 percent if you consider that no one's getting through adulthood without going through their 20s first.Raise your hand if you're in your 20s.I really want to see some twentysomethings here.Oh, yay!Y'all's awesome.If you work with twentysomethings, you love a twentysomething, you're losing sleep over twentysomethings, I want to see — Okay.Awesome, twentysomethings really matter.So I specialize in twentysomethings because I believe that every single one of those 50 million twentysomethings deserves to know what psychologists, sociologists, neurologists and fertility specialists already know: that claiming your 20s is one of the simplest, yet most transformative, things you can do for work, for love, for your happiness, maybe even for the world.This is not my opinion.These are the facts.We know that 80 percent of life's most defining moments take place by age 35.That means that eight out of 10 of the decisions and experiences and “Aha!” moments that make your life what it is will have happened by your mid-30s.People who are over 40, don't panic.This crowd is going to be fine, I think.We know that the first 10 years of a career has an exponential impact on how much money you're going to earn.We know that more than half of Americans are married or are living with or dating their future partner by 30.We know that the brain caps off its second and last growth spurt in your 20s as it rewires itself for adulthood, which means that whatever it is you want to change about yourself, now is the time to change it.We know that personality changes more during your 20s than at any other time in life, and we know that female fertility peaks at age 28, and things get tricky after age 35.So your 20s are the time to educate yourself about your body and your options.So when we think about child development, we all know that the first five years are a critical period for language and attachment in the brain.It's a time when your ordinary, day-to-day life has an inordinate impact on who you will become.But what we hear less about is that there's such a thing as adult development, and our 20s are that critical period of adult development.But this isn't what twentysomethings are hearing.Newspapers talk about the changing timetable of adulthood.Researchers call the 20s an extended adolescence.Journalists coin silly nicknames for twentysomethings like “twixters” and “kidults.” It's true.As a culture, we have trivialized what is actually the defining decade of adulthood.Leonard Bernstein said that to achieve great things, you need a plan and not quite enough time.Isn't that true? So what do you think happens when you pat a twentysomething on the head and you say, “You have 10 extra years to start your life”? Nothing happens.You have robbed that person of his urgency and ambition, and absolutely nothing happens.And then every day, smart, interesting twentysomethings like you or like your sons and daughters come into my office and say things like this: “I know my boyfriend's no good for me, but this relationship doesn't count.I'm just killing time.” Or they say, “Everybody says as long as I get started on a career by the time I'm 30, I'll be fine.”

But then it starts to sound like this: “My 20s are almost over, and I have nothing to show for myself.I had a better résumé the day after I graduated from college.”

And then it starts to sound like this: “Dating in my 20s was like musical chairs.Everybody was running around and having fun, but then sometime around 30 it was like the music turned off and everybody started sitting down.I didn't want to be the only one left standing up, so sometimes I think I married my husband because he was the closest chair to me at 30.”

Where are the twentysomethings here? Do not do that.Okay, now that sounds a little flip, but make no mistake, the stakes are very high.When a lot has been pushed to your 30s, there is enormous thirtysomething pressure to jump-start a career, pick a city, partner up, and have two or three kids in a much shorter period of time.Many of these things are incompatible, and as research is just starting to show, simply harder and more stressful to do all at once in our 30s.The post-millennial midlife crisis isn't buying a red sports car.It's realizing you can't have that career you now want.It's realizing you can't have that child you now want, or you can't give your child a sibling.Too many thirtysomethings and fortysomethings look at themselves, and at me, sitting across the room, and say about their 20s, “What was I doing? What was I thinking?”

I want to change what twentysomethings are doing and thinking.Here's a story about how that can go.It's a story about a woman named Emma.At 25, Emma came to my office because she was, in her words, having an identity crisis.She said she thought she might like to work in art or entertainment, but she hadn't decided yet, so she'd spent the last few years waiting tables instead.Because it was cheaper, she lived with a boyfriend who displayed his temper more than his ambition.And as hard as her 20s were, her early life had been even harder.She often cried in our sessions, but then would collect herself by saying, “You can't pick your family, but you can pick your friends.”

Well one day, Emma comes in and she hangs her head in her lap, and she sobbed for most of the hour.She'd just bought a new address book, and she'd spent the morning filling in her many contacts, but then she'd been left staring at that empty blank that comes after the words “In case of emergency, please call....” She was nearly hysterical when she looked at me and said, “Who's going to be there for me if I get in a car wreck? Who's going to take care of me if I have cancer?”

Now in that moment, it took everything I had not to say, “I will.” But what Emma needed wasn't some therapist who really, really cared.Emma needed a better life, and I knew this was her chance.I had learned too much since I first worked with Alex to just sit there while Emma's defining decade went parading by.So over the next weeks and months, I told Emma three things that every twentysomething, male or female, deserves to hear.First, I told Emma to forget about having an identity crisis and get some identity capital.By get identity capital, I mean do something that adds value to who you are.Do something that's an investment in who you might want to be next.I didn't know the future of Emma's career, and no one knows the future of work, but I do know this: Identity capital begets identity capital.So now is the time for that cross-country job, that internship, that startup you want to try.I'm not discounting twentysomething exploration here, but I am discounting exploration that's not supposed to count, which, by the way, is not exploration.That's procrastination.I told Emma to explore work and make it count.Second, I told Emma that the urban tribe is overrated.Best friends are great for giving rides to the airport, but twentysomethings who huddle together with like-minded peers limit who they know, what they know, how they think, how they speak, and where they work.That new piece of capital, that new person to date almost always comes from outside the inner circle.New things come from what are called our weak ties, our friends of friends of friends.So yes, half of twentysomethings are un-or under-employed.But half aren't, and weak ties are how you get yourself into that group.Half of new jobs are never posted, so reaching out to your neighbor's boss is how you get that un-posted job.It's not cheating.It's the science of how information spreads.Last but not least, Emma believed that you can't pick your family, but you can pick your friends.Now this was true for her growing up, but as a twentysomething, soon Emma would pick her family when she partnered with someone and created a family of her own.I told Emma the time to start picking your family is now.Now you may be thinking that 30 is actually a better time to settle down than 20, or even 25, and I agree with you.But grabbing whoever you're living with or sleeping with when everyone on Facebook starts walking down the aisle is not progress.The best time to work on your marriage is before you have one, and that means being as intentional with love as you are with work.Picking your family is about consciously choosing who and what you want rather than just making it work or killing time with whoever happens to be choosing you.So what happened to Emma? Well, we went through that address book, and she found an old roommate's cousin who worked at an art museum in another state.That weak tie helped her get a job there.That job offer gave her the reason to leave that live-in boyfriend.Now, five years later, she's a special events planner for museums.She's married to a man she mindfully chose.She loves her new career, she loves her new family, and she sent me a card that said, “Now the emergency contact blanks don't seem big enough.”

Now Emma's story made that sound easy, but that's what I love about working with twentysomethings.They are so easy to help.Twentysomethings are like airplanes just leaving LAX, bound for somewhere west.Right after takeoff, a slight change in course is the difference between landing in Alaska or Fiji.Likewise, at 21 or 25 or even 29, one good conversation, one good break, one good TED Talk, can have an enormous effect across years and even generations to come.So here's an idea worth spreading to every twentysomething you know.It's as simple as what I learned to say to Alex.It's what I now have the privilege of saying to twentysomethings like Emma every single day: Thirty is not the new 20, so claim your adulthood, get some identity capital, use your weak ties, pick your family.Don't be defined by what you didn't know or didn't do.You're deciding your life right now.Thank you.(Applause)

En8848原版英語(yǔ)學(xué)習(xí)網(wǎng)

第五篇：·女孩到了二十幾歲后

女孩到了二十幾歲后，就是一朵盛開(kāi)最美麗的花，女孩的一季花期一定要記得只開(kāi)給自己看，千萬(wàn)不要為了別人讓自己的花期接受不必要的摧殘。二十幾歲的女孩是一杯清茶，其中的清秀一定要留給懂得品嘗的人，別讓那些沒(méi)有品味的人踐踏了你的清純氣息。二十幾歲的女孩是片蔚藍(lán)色的天空，它可是悲傷的，也可以是寬敞的，但，請(qǐng)記住，它一定是有追求的。